ATM instructions
11-24-2005, 10:34 PM
#1
Senior Member
SL Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 185
ATM instructions
ATM Instructions
A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing
new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash
without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are
requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their
accounts.
"After months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE procedures have been
developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
***********************************************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the
machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing
new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash
without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are
requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their
accounts.
"After months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE procedures have been
developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
***********************************************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the
machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
11-25-2005, 08:56 AM
#5
Oh that's so true sometimes... *sigh*
Reminds me of a gal I used to work with when I was still an engineer.
Here's Brandi's story: http://www.tijil.org/blog/?p=15
Reminds me of a gal I used to work with when I was still an engineer.
Here's Brandi's story: http://www.tijil.org/blog/?p=15
02-10-2006, 05:46 PM
#8
Senior Member
SL Member
Team ScioNRG
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Out of my mind....
Posts: 1,044
^^ This is funny.. On wed I went to the bank to get out some money and there where these 2 women (I will leave out their nationalities to keep it friendly) in front of me at the atm. 1 lady was actually showing the other lady how to use the atm. The lady being taught kept trying to hit "enter" and then her pin number.. I stood there in dismay shaking my head while looking at the floor...
02-10-2006, 05:57 PM
#10
Senior Member
Scikotics
SL Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 809
Originally Posted by Tomas
Oh that's so true sometimes... *sigh*
Reminds me of a gal I used to work with when I was still an engineer.
Here's Brandi's story: http://www.tijil.org/blog/?p=15
Reminds me of a gal I used to work with when I was still an engineer.
Here's Brandi's story: http://www.tijil.org/blog/?p=15
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