tC4italy

"Comparing" it to murder and child molesting is quite different than to stealing candies

Jenna

I agree with that too.

Frosty355

In the eye's of God, Not the eye's of man. With God it's black and white. There is no good in evil. there is no evil in good.

What does this have to do with your work-mate?

bcnu_702

Ur co-worker ____es me off seattledave. We want people to not just talk about rape so casually (as a victim) unless they are speaking out to authorities. It's such a sensitive subject, but to joke about rape or talk about it as a revenge scheme or attention scheme is horrible, and she should be ashamed of herself, if thats what she is doing it for. Women are hard to figure out, they're emotions go crazy so who knows. She could be telling the truth.

S1lent

She's an idiot. Probably mad because it was a one night stand... Or because he stuck it in her pooper.

trust

exactly.

here's what i think went down:

she went the bar, as she would do every night, wanting a fairy-tale like romance to spur up and sweep her off her feet. so she does the classic poise and orders a martini. it just so happens that a man hits on her and she is mildly aroused at the fact that she just got hersel a free drink from this guy. after couple more drinks, she is loose caboose and decides to 'seal the deal' by inviting him over to her apartment. as they get to the apartment, the alcohol wore off, and she realized what she was doing, but she couldn't just put him down like that. besides, she hasn't had sex in months and this might be something special, like in the movies. so, they do it, only to realize that she made a mistake. a big mistake that she would've rather have been raped than sleep with this dude.

seattledave

that's my vote.

bcnu_702

^ x3

Moral of the story, we all agree rape is bad/disgusting, you name it. It is wrong. It is not always easy to report the situation and profess something like rape has occurred. It is mentally and physically damaging to say the least. Your co-worker should be suggested to talk to the authorities in the event her statements are true and she believes she was raped. Good luck to her, and I hope she really wasn't raped.

evilBOXevil

Whether she can 'legally' make that claim, or has any desire to do so, is secondary.
Anything sexual that could have gone on, that she would have resisted or refused- or was forced or pushed into- is rape.

Even if they started to do something, and she changed her mind in the middle of it- and told him to stop- if he continues, it is rape.
A test kit, or anything else will not show things like this. There may not be any physical signs of force at all. The most it might show is that they sex. ...and the only way that can harm the guy is if he says he didn't have sex with her. If he says he did have sex, but she was willing, then he is in the clear.
...but the fact remains: Anything sexual that may have happened, if she was not consenting 100% to, is rape- whether she can prove it or not.

If your real concern is for some guy in this situation, he's probably 'legally' fine.
If your concerned for the girl- just because she can talk about it to you, doesn't mean it wasn't rape.

No woman is going to falsly claim that she was raped, if she isn't going to take action. So, unless she tells you she's gonna get this guy or something, there's no reason to not believe her.

tC4italy

You, are obviously an idiot. Maybe you should get a metal rod up yours.

tC4italy

Thnx Frosty ;)

tC4italy

.

I seriously hope you are kidding.

trust

i am, but you have to understand the psychology of this situation. instead of feeling like she made a poor choice of doing the ONS with this dude, she would rather have felt like a victim for that which it would instantly make her a martyr to the crime, taken the fact that she got really drunk and invited a guy she barely even knew to her apartment. so, taken this scenerio, you could only come to two logical resolutions: 1) she wanted sex, but at which point did she not want it is the question. 2) her dignity as a woman is crushed to due to this ONS incident, and therefore, she makes up an elaborate lie to cover it up and make herself feel better.

tC4italy

with option 2 yr completly off

I think any woman alive on this planet would rather be known to have been 'easy' one night than to be a rape victim. That is where you are wrong, she has much less 'confidence/dignity' in admitting to having being raped than having sex with a stranger.

If that is the case with this lady, then she's obviously not sane.

But again I doubt we will ever know what happened.

trust

^ yeah you're right with number 2. although with cases like these, you have to assume the worst.

i feel like a detective.

I-Fly-High

We had a discussin like this in my Physc class two years ago and not a single person could come to an equall opinion on what the diffrence.

It all comes down to your own personal thought and moral upbringing.

As a Christian rape is wrong on all counts. I feel that if you are good decent person you should demand more information so you can help the person not so you can laugh in their face and tell them that it sucks but you brought it on your self.

As for my own personal opnion I think if she didnt want to do it at any part of the expirence then it is rape regardless as was said before, if she stripped the guy down and put the condom on herself.

scionofPCFL

a) Your co-worker is an absolute moron, and put herself in a horrible situation, however that in no way excuses the guy. But it was a completely avoidable situation none-the-less. At some point, people have to realize that there are bad people in this world and self preservatvion dictates that you actively avoid uncontrolable situations. Hopefully, she learned a cheap lesson here, but I doubt it.

b) If at any point, she told the dude, "no" or "stop" or "wait" or anything like that, then it becomes rape. Bar none, end of story.

c) There is not enough evidence to determine if this is morning regret ("I'm not a **** so he must have raped me.") or outright rape

d) Assuming this dude who she let into her home after meeting once at a bar forced himself on her, she is still a disgusting winch for comparing herself to a woman who is attacked out of the blue by a stanger and has to fear for her life at the same time as having her dignity taken away. Date rape is bad, but being brutalized at knife or gun point and walking away with permanent physical and/or psychological damage is far worse. I mean, they aren't even in the same league.

I would be interested in knowing whether or not the dude stayed there overnight.

hotbox05

bull...

if the girl has a name and evidence it's as cut and dry as black and white. she may feel bad but she's a victim and one that can at least have justice back

hotbox05

not true. women falsely proclaim rape , as well as pregnancies.

the pregnancy bit is used all too frequently.

Jan06xB

Any chance that a date rape drug was used? He bought the drink, did he handle it and spike it with something?