Washington Barbies
05-10-2006, 08:23 PM
#1
Senior Member
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Scion Evolution
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Kirkland
Posts: 972
Washington Barbies
I posted this here cuz well people that arent from the Northwest wouldnt really get it!
Washington Barbie’s are FINALLY Available!!!!
Seattle/ Bainbridge Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a Mercedes 4WD SUV, a Prada handbag and matching Nike Yoga ensemble. She has a master’s degree and double-majored, but has the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom with Ken's generous salary. Comes with Percocet prescription and Botox. Starbucks mug and traffic-jamming Blackberry internet/cell phone device sold separately.
Husband Ken is into fishing, golfing, baseball and is often working late.
Available at all Seattle-area Starbucks retailers.
Bellevue Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at Nordstrom. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, your choice of a BMW convertible or Hummer H2 and a longhaired foreign lapdog named "Honey". Also available is her cookie-cutter development dream house. Available with or without tummy tuck, facelift, and breast augmentation. Workaholic, cheating husband, Ken, comes with a Porsche.
Tacoma Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, switchblade, '78 El Camino with dark tinted windows, and a meth lab kit.
This model is available only after dark and can only be purchased with cash- preferably small bills, unless you're a cop, then we don't know what you're talking about. Boyfriend Ken is in jail.
Available at many pawn shops.
Everett Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie comes with a Pair of high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer Gut Ken out of Monroe Barbie's trailer. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, strawberry lip gloss and a see-through halter top. Purchase her Mustang convertible separately and get a Confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Boyfriend Ken is in treatment.
Available at Army Navy Surplus.
Monroe Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans 2 sizes too small, steel-toed cowboy boots, a classic Metallica T-shirt & a Tweedy Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has fake fingernails, a six pack of Budweiser, and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over a distance of 6 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's ___ when she is drunk. Also available is the gold-toned cubic zirconium ring that Ken gave her after another one of his "episodes" with his boss's daughter. Comes with Barbie's Dream Double Wide Trailer.
Available at Wal-Mart.
Kitsap Barbie: Pregnant at purchase, this Barbie comes with a stroller and bus pass. Also included is a G.E.D. and a completely filled out PFD form. Construction worker Ken and his '82 Caddy are optional.
Available at Value Village.
Vashon Island Barbie: This Barbie is made out of recycled plastic & tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch less feet, hairy armpits, no make-up, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She does not want, or need, a Ken doll. If you purchase the optional Subaru wagon, you will receive a free rainbow flag sticker.
Available at REI.
Olympia Barbie: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or removing snap on parts. Walks to work. Likes to "experiment", but will never commit. This model is being phased out and is only available from the manufacturer.
Washington Barbie’s are FINALLY Available!!!!
Seattle/ Bainbridge Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a Mercedes 4WD SUV, a Prada handbag and matching Nike Yoga ensemble. She has a master’s degree and double-majored, but has the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom with Ken's generous salary. Comes with Percocet prescription and Botox. Starbucks mug and traffic-jamming Blackberry internet/cell phone device sold separately.
Husband Ken is into fishing, golfing, baseball and is often working late.
Available at all Seattle-area Starbucks retailers.
Bellevue Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at Nordstrom. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, your choice of a BMW convertible or Hummer H2 and a longhaired foreign lapdog named "Honey". Also available is her cookie-cutter development dream house. Available with or without tummy tuck, facelift, and breast augmentation. Workaholic, cheating husband, Ken, comes with a Porsche.
Tacoma Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, switchblade, '78 El Camino with dark tinted windows, and a meth lab kit.
This model is available only after dark and can only be purchased with cash- preferably small bills, unless you're a cop, then we don't know what you're talking about. Boyfriend Ken is in jail.
Available at many pawn shops.
Everett Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie comes with a Pair of high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer Gut Ken out of Monroe Barbie's trailer. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, strawberry lip gloss and a see-through halter top. Purchase her Mustang convertible separately and get a Confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Boyfriend Ken is in treatment.
Available at Army Navy Surplus.
Monroe Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans 2 sizes too small, steel-toed cowboy boots, a classic Metallica T-shirt & a Tweedy Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has fake fingernails, a six pack of Budweiser, and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over a distance of 6 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's ___ when she is drunk. Also available is the gold-toned cubic zirconium ring that Ken gave her after another one of his "episodes" with his boss's daughter. Comes with Barbie's Dream Double Wide Trailer.
Available at Wal-Mart.
Kitsap Barbie: Pregnant at purchase, this Barbie comes with a stroller and bus pass. Also included is a G.E.D. and a completely filled out PFD form. Construction worker Ken and his '82 Caddy are optional.
Available at Value Village.
Vashon Island Barbie: This Barbie is made out of recycled plastic & tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch less feet, hairy armpits, no make-up, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She does not want, or need, a Ken doll. If you purchase the optional Subaru wagon, you will receive a free rainbow flag sticker.
Available at REI.
Olympia Barbie: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or removing snap on parts. Walks to work. Likes to "experiment", but will never commit. This model is being phased out and is only available from the manufacturer.
05-26-2006, 04:10 PM
#9
Senior Member
SL Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Bay, CA & South Sound, WA (Dual Resident)
Posts: 3,036
Seattle/ Bainbridge Barbie: This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a Mercedes 4WD SUV, a Prada handbag and matching Nike Yoga ensemble. She has a master’s degree and double-majored, but has the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom with Ken's generous salary. Comes with Percocet prescription and Botox. Starbucks mug and traffic-jamming Blackberry internet/cell phone device sold separately.
Husband Ken is into fishing, golfing, baseball and is often working late.
Available at all Seattle-area Starbucks retailers.
Husband Ken is into fishing, golfing, baseball and is often working late.
Available at all Seattle-area Starbucks retailers.
I am a retired homemaker at 30 with no kids (previous database analyst benefits and my hubby's career).
I am a college graduate who's going back to school for fun.
My favorite stores are Pottery Barn, Restoration Hardware, and Williams-Sonoma.
And...Starbucks was my best friend but once my weight started to balloon from the 3-4 venti carmel mochas and when I actually took a look at what I spent there for nothing...gasp...I haven't had any blended coffees since Feb 28th (aside from trying the new banana frap once).
BTW...I wanted the big SUV but my hubby got me hooked on xBs!!!!
Boy...what do I do to turn this around??? I sound like such a bad person.
At least I use my time for good instead of evil...and to mod my scions!!!
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